In Remembrance...

When I tried to think of a word or phrase to describe my father-in-law, 'gentle giant' kept coming to mind.  And that description is so perfect.  He was a big man, in height as well as build, but his heart was even bigger. 

I got to know Wes Kelley in my teens, first as our church missionary along with his wife, then as my boyfriend's father, and finally, as my beloved father-in-law.  He would always tell me stories about Craig's younger years.  He would talk about Craig and his younger brother spending time with the Kelley's, flying back and forth between Texas and New Mexico in the Cessna plane he owned and piloted himself, before finalizing the adoption of the two boys.  He would often tell the same stories over and over.  A very specific story was when the boys first came to live with them and they wouldn't go outside.  They had five acres of land to explore, but stayed indoors, perhaps for a sense of security.  But since Wes owned his own successful construction company, WesCo, he had a truck full of dirt delivered to their house and had it dumped in a portion of the yard (remember, they had 5 acres).  After that, full of childlike wonderment, the boys could no longer be kept from going outdoors.  Many adventures were had with toy trucks and imaginations on that big dirt pile.

As I heard that same story countless times over the years, I realized it's not because he forgot he already told me the story.  It's because that story left a long lasting impression on him.  It was a story forever etched in his heart about the growing bond between him and two little boys that would learn to call him Dad. 

Wes was known for his work ethic.  He would get up early to get the job done.  Sure, he would stop at a local diner for coffee with his friends (and he had a myriad of them), socializing and catching up on the happenings of their small city of Carlsbad.  Then, it would be a full day of construction, managing a crew, dealing with any obstacles, and providing quality work.  It was a characteristic that Craig always remembered and used as a plumb line for his own life.

When our paths finally crossed, Wes and Wanda had already been called to the mission field.  They obeyed the Lord in giving up their own company and the comfort it provided to continue construction for the sake of the Gospel by building churches, orphanages, and Bible schools.  So, when I finally realized that my new boyfriend's parents were actually the missionaries that attended and were supported by our church, I was dumbfounded.  Awestruck is probably a better term.  I had such great admiration for them and all the work they were doing.  They were truly living examples of how a person can live their life in faith and stand strong amidst any adversity that comes their way. 

Until the Lord makes you kneel.

We were all part of a wonderful Assemblies of God church in El Paso, Harvest Christian Center, and the Spirit was always so alive. So very real.  I can clearly remember one service when the Spirit completely took over the service.  There was shouting, crying, praising in the name of the Lord.  And there was Wes.  Always one to acknowledge God's presence and its power, he was against the wall, weeping, and unable to stand.  With Bible in one hand and the other holding onto the wall, he was praying in a language only God could understand. And so I got to personally witness this gentle giant of a man become humbled and brought to his knees by the power of the Holy Spirit.

I remember another time that happened after the birth of our first child.  A friend of ours was teasing us and asking "where's the parenting manual for this?"  Laughing, Wes held up his Bible (which was never far from him) and said, "it's right here."  He understood how important it was to raise children to love the Lord, which he successfully did.  He was delighted to know Craig and I believed the same and always asked us about our church and sermons and Sunday School lessons that were being taught.  When I was a VBS director for close to a decade, I know Wes and Wanda were praying continuously for little lives to be touched (as well as my sanity!).

Touching lives, impacting families, and reaching the lost is the legacy he has left behind.  I am always so floored and amazed by the many testimonies that are all because Wes and Wanda Kelley lived in obedience.  He once told me a story of one of their missions trips. A man that was completely deaf was instantly healed during a revival service.  I can only imagine the many, many miracles they had seen and were part of. 

Wes loved talking about the Lord, Heaven, and all that Jesus did for us.  He never stopped being a witness.  Even in his last few days, one of his nurses saw a plaque hanging on the wall, recognizing him for his missions work in Mexico.  She thought it was such a wonderful thing and was also awed by the life her patient lived. 

Watching a loved one with Alzheimer's is devastating.  Their words can't seem to be found and everything becomes strange and confusing.  There was a beautiful moment that occurred in October as he sat beside the bed of his gravely ill wife.  Wes was not completely aware of what was going on but knew we were in a hospital and that his wife of 60 years was sick.  He didn't say much but sat there and would occasionally ask her if she was ok.  Then the music therapist came in for a session.  She softly strummed her guitar and sang several hymns.  Wes sang every. single. word.  I had never heard him sing before.  In recent months, he had not been talking as much either.  But to see him sing those hymns that were so familiar to him from his younger days, and continue to praise the Lord, because he never ever forgot his identity in Christ, was the most magnificent and fascinating thing I had ever seen.  He used that time to talk to the music therapist about the Lord and how important it was to know Him.  He may have forgotten how to do many things, but he had not forgotten how to be a witness.  The tears just flowed from me as I sat there in stunned silence.

Wes absolutely loved his family.  He loved his grandkids and great-grandkids.  He had some special moments with Preston in the last few months.  He taught us all so much about how to live and serve.  He taught us how to work hard and be generous with the blessings we were given. I watched Craig as he watched his father in his last few days. I could see the love and utmost admiration that was there. I know that is the type of dad that Craig wants to be.

So my tears that I shed are not sad tears because Wes is gone.  I am very thankful his caged mind has now been set free.  I am happy to know he has been reunited with the love of his life.  I am elated that he now gets to forever be in the presence of his Heavenly Father that he so faithfully served.  But rather, my tears are those of being heartbroken for Craig and his family for losing both parents within three months of each other.  We have truly entered into a season of grief that has no time frame.

Even though people will no longer have the chance to meet Wes Kelley and allow him to leave an imprint in their lives, his legacy goes on.  All he has done by serving the Lord will never be forgotten and will impact future generations.  And despite the awards and accolades he may have received, he always gave the glory to God.

"Well done, good and faithful servant."-Matthew 25:23

Year of Kindness

A new year brings new beginnings, new goals, and new resolutions.  Although we can begin all of these things at any given time, it is always the norm to wait for the first day of the year.  Everyone is always so eager to make a fresh start on January 1st.

For 2019, it is the Year of Kindness for the Kelley family.  I'd like to think we are kind all the time, but this year, we want to exhibit it even more.  We want others to feel welcome in our home, come over for a hot meal or cup of coffee.  We want to be available if someone just needs to talk.  Our home is open, our hearts are open.

We want to do more random acts of kindness.  A year ago, we spent a month doing random acts of kindness and it was wonderful.  We loved seeing the kids get excited and were so eager to participate and bring a smile to people's faces.  Some we knew and some we didn't.

We have a big year coming up with lots of milestones to be reached and celebrations to be had.  We want to extend our joys and happiness to others.  We don't like to see others left out and everyone deserves some happiness.  And in this world where kindness seems to be waning and almost disappearing at times, we want to revive it. 

We can do our part by extending kindness to others on a daily basis.  We encourage others to be kinder also.  It doesn't have to cost money.  A smile, a hug, a compliment, a word of encouragement...all of these things can go a long ways.

As we make our way through this next year, trudging through any obstacles that we may have to overcome, don't lose that spirit of kindness.  When our days are tough, someone else's day may be tougher.  When someone is celebrating, let's celebrate with them. Simply, let's be kind.